High School Reunions

My 10-year high school reunion was this last weekend, which means the last couple of weeks I’ve gotten lots of friend requests on Facebook from people I haven’t seen in 10 years and haven’t talked to ever.

I didn’t end up going because it seemed silly to spend a lot of money just to make awkward conversation with people and pretend to be interested in their children, especially since most of the people I’m actually still friends with weren’t going either.

I did skim through the list of people registered for the reunion and found that there were basically four types of people based off of their profile picture.

The “I’m using my body to try and distract you from the fact that I haven’t really done anything.”

The “I’m an artist and I don’t care about success because that’s selling out.”

The “I have children! Did you notice I have children?!”

And the “I used to be the high school quarterback but now I just drink a lot because being an athlete didn’t actually get me anywhere in life.”

Of course, there’s a lot of successful people I graduated with too, but it’s not fun to talk about them. Also, they make me feel less successful, and, let’s face it, high school reunions are mainly for people who need to compare themselves with their peers to see how they are doing. I can do that by looking at Facebook, which basically saved me $200 and a lot of “Wow, isn’t he cute. Is that a bong he’s playing with?”

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7 Responses to High School Reunions

  1. mazemangriot says:

    I missed my 15 cause thats when we finally got it together. When I was going to go I realized I didn’t much like anyone anyway. And your right facebook does all of this. Ive friended many people I went to high school with. Read a few days in their lives and realized or remembered oh yea I didn’t like them as teens I really hate them as adults. NIce post! Who cares what others are doing, keep doing your thing!

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  2. OMG. I am #3. I even have a blog about being #3. Well, it doesn’t apply to me because I’m funnier than the other #3s at my reunion. Way funnier.

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  3. mkep73 says:

    My 20th is next weekend and I am not going for the exact same reasons! I feel validated now. Thanks! 🙂

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  4. Danniel says:

    I could see how reunions would be less meaningful now with social networking sites that let you keep up on what all those people in high school you never really liked that much are doing without ever having to meet them.

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  5. juliaa says:

    what’s disturbing is that i haven’t really accomplished anything much. but i do have boobs. but they do not show in my fb picture, or any of my pictures. that probably makes me boring and disappointingly unmockable.

    but at least i’m not one of those high achievers.

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  6. YuzuHoney says:

    This is hilarious! My 10 year is approaching sometime next year. I live in another country-oh darn! Facebook really has taken whatever “magic” reunions had. I already know way too much about the personal lives of people who I was never really friends with, the last thing I need is to make a date of it! What is even stupider than 10 year reunions though, are 5 year reunions. Five years?! We’ve all (well, most) just finished college, and half my high school class went to the same university!

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  7. anonymously says:

    Let’s hope I feel that way when I get out of high school.

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