Human Food

There’s a place near my work that I walk by often that has a large sign advertising “Hunan Food.” My mind transposes this into “Human Food,” which makes me giggle because I have the humor of a five-year-old. (Except for fart jokes, which I hate with a passion. Actually I mostly just hate the word “fart.” If I ever have a child, my main objective will be to prevent him or her from ever learning the word “fart.” My second objective will be to teach said child to weed the lawn so the neighbors stop judging me.)

Anyway, “Human Food” is funny because it’s so vague. I mean, it could be anything!

The possible things “Human Food” could be, according to my warped imagination.

First, the obvious.

Food for pet humans.

Not peas, because I hate them.

A weird scene involving consenting adults.

I told you it was warped.

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5 Responses to Human Food

  1. I’d really like to see what is going on behind that black box, but maybe its better left covered up. So you don’t like fart jokes? Well you’ve clearly never read this post here: I’ll understand if you choose to ban me from visiting your site 🙂


  2. Kelly says:

    I actually heard a little Mexican guy ask for “Human Beef” at the Chinese place I go to… But he pronounced it like Hunan… Came out “Hu-maaaan” I was cracking up because my husband and I make that joke every time we see it…


  3. NC Chick says:

    I love your blog 🙂


  4. bweissler says:

    Should have worked for the Twilight Zone, baby.


  5. Whitney says:

    Soylent Green


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