When Will the Rapture Happen? Flowchart

Did you hear the Rapture is supposed to happen again today? I’m actually a little freaked out because we had three earthquakes in the Bay Area yesterday. Did I mention that I live on the Hayward Fault? Because I live on the Hayward Fault.

So anyway, Harold Camping claims that probably maybe the Rapture will happen today (or tomorrow). And I thought, wouldn’t it be nice if everyone knew for sure when it would happen? We know who will be Raptured, so this flowchart should take care of the when.

You’re welcome, Harold Camping.

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15 Responses to When Will the Rapture Happen? Flowchart

  1. SimonB says:

    Wise words, I lost count on the Ark though (couldn’t decide whether to count the animals alphabetically in English or Aramaic) so have no idea if I’m going to get Raptured or not.

    Hope the earthquakes didn’t do any damage – read your tweets while I was eating my breakfast and was a teensy bit worried for you and yours.

    (P.S. going back to things people don’t do in dreams – it seems I have been talking in my sleep of late, and the wife now worries that I’m obsessed with long legs. I have no idea why).


  2. Loved it. Shared it.

    Harold may actually be confused. The Big Dude may have been informing Camp of his own death, and the old guy thinks he gets to take us all with him.


  3. Conversation with Hubby last night:
    Me: So, that Camping guy says the Rapture’s tomorrow…
    Hubby: What’s a Rapture?
    Me: That’s when the Faithful think they’re gonna get sucked-up into heaven, and everyone else has to stay on earth and have wars and stuff…Didn’t you cover Revelations in your Bible Lit class?
    Hubby: No. We never did… I’m not faithful – guess I’m not going! (Eyes me for a moment)…Are YOU going?
    Me: I dunno…I USED to be faithful…maybe that’s enough?
    Hubby: Aw, CRAP! You mean you’d just go off and LEAVE?

    Moral of the story: It’s not nice to mess with Hubby’s head after he’s had a bottle and a half of wine, and before he’s had dinner…

    Obviously, I’m still here… 😀 Tribulation party, anyone?


  4. Anna says:

    We need cake to make up for the fact that the rapture never happened.
    Cake fixes everything.


  5. Hahaha this is hilarious. My father is always talking about the rapture. It’s kind of an ongoing joke between us. I think he really believes it though…


  6. Kathy H says:

    So I’m a little late… you guys have me laughing so hard I have tears running down my leg. Crap, now I need cake. Sharing!!!


  7. Olivier says:

    Dear Peas and Cougars,

    Do you autorise me to translate your flowhchart, and to use it in : http://www.la-fin-du-monde.fr

    Off course, the translate text will be linked to the original website, and you will be mentioned as the writer.
    La-fin-du-monde.fr (the-end-of-the-world.fr) is a french blog about every aspect of the end of the world : movie, comics, music, book… (Were not doomsayer or conspirationist…)
    (as you can read, my ‘french to english’ is realy poor, but I work realy better in the other way. I can send you a copy of the translation if you want to read and check it)

    Thank you.



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